Tag: pride

the reward of focus, lead us not into temptation, lead us not into temptation, desire, something wrong, unwise, enticement, pride, self-aggrandisement, distortion of purpose, getting off track, where your treasure is, invest your time, spend money, important priorities, core values, vision board, focus your attention, where attention goes energy flows, as you think, grounded and centred, keep your eye on the prize, learning and personal development

Lead us not into temptation: the reward of focus

Beth Gray - blogger, coach, consultant1 Comment

When we say “lead us not into temptation”, most of us think of temptation as “sin”. But I want to suggest that temptation is the desire to do something, especially something that is considered wrong or unwise. I also invite you to define sin as to “miss the mark” – i.e. to take your eyes off the target and fail to shoot straight.

Lead us not into temptation, could very well be understood as: let me not get side-tracked and forget my priorities and purpose. Lead me not into the temptation of getting so busy and worked up that I forget the goal that I am working towards.

We say “resist the Devil, and he will flee from you”, but the devil is in the details, in the little things. The devil is in all the ways that I waste time and get off track.

The reality is that while pride, self-aggrandisement may well be an enticement, the real temptation is much more subtle. Temptation usually presents itself in the form of shiny objects that remove our focus from greatness and allow us to settle for good. We accept the simple pleasures now, rather than working hard towards long-term goals.

We turn and look at all of our differences, rather than seeing how we are all loved and connected to each other and the Divine.

Where your treasure is…

How do you keep your purpose and vision before you? What do you prioritise above other things?

One of the ways to realise what your priorities are is to consider asking others what they see in you. I did that today and asked others what my treasures were. These are some of the answers that I received:

  • my daughter
  • my rescues – cats & dogs
  • consistency, getting stuff done, tenacity, unmatched courage and tenacity in the face of challenges
  • compassion, capacity to love, sharing, enthusiastic encouragement of and deep empathy for those around you
  • passion, fire, zest, energy, motivation
  • insane levels of capacity to learn and execute that learning under pressure, inquisitive, intellect, brilliant, knowledge
  • smile, beautiful face, eyes
  • courage
  • depth, intuitive wisdom
  • authenticity, openness
  • confidence
  • positive vibes, positivity
  • charming
  • healthy boundaries
  • books
  • humour

what do I treasure, the treasures of the heart, as a man thinks in his heart, priorities, core values, vision board, visionboard

And yet several things are missing that I truly treasure:

Silence, nature & meditation
Divine inspiration
Writing
Sleep (how did they miss sleep?)
Health & wellness

Another way that you can see what your treasures are: have a look at how you invest your time and where you spend your money. In which case, without a doubt, I have the following priorities (in no particular order):

  • my business
  • writing
  • my daughter, health & pets
  • too much social media for my own good!
  • And definitely, too much time spent looking at business and social media metrics and results, without actually looking at what actions I will take to change those results

Lead us not into temptation … caught up being busy, rather than actually living our purpose!

Take a sheet a paper, drawing a line down the middle. On one side, you write down your priorities and what is essential in your life. What do I treasure? Now, on the other hand, for the next 7 days, write down where you spend your time and money.

Where are you lead into temptation?

I have many tools that I use to keep me focused on the target:

  1. my values: 6 words that I keep before me each day:
    1. Divine
    2. aligned
    3. connected
    4. courageous
    5. creative
    6. thriving
  2. a vision board: a visual representation of what I want to make manifest in my life
  3. A list of 50: fifty things that I said at the beginning of the year were necessary to do this year. They are divided into ten sections, including health, spiritual practice & growth, holidays, income streams, professional growth, etc. But a reminder that action and works are equally important in this life.

That is what I focus my attention on each day: reminders that keep me on track so that I am less likely to be led into temptation by the shiny objects that appear in my path.

Where attention goes, energy flows

It is so easy to get caught up in being “busy”, with your focus on a to-do list and day-to-day demands on your time. Are you intentional about how you focus?

Now that you have had an opportunity to review your life, what are you pouring yourself into? What do you invest your time thinking about? What consumes your thoughts?

As a man thinks in his heart, so he is.

Prov. 23:7

Your thoughts are busy creating who you are – what you will say and then what you will do. A simple change in your focus and attention will allow you to pour your energy and effort into your purpose.

This, in turn, allows you to get new results.

What’s on your mind today?

what's on your mind, where do you spend your time, invest your time

The most important thing to remember is the most important thing.

What is distracting you from the most critical priorities?

Lead me not into the temptation of distractions, chasing my tail, and putting out fires.

When I am grounded and centred, I remember that I get my prize for performing on my stage. Not as a guest performance on someone else’s expectations and priorities.

Where is my purpose in my daily schedule? How does my agenda reflect my values? Or am I easily distracted by shiny objects that lead me into temptation?

Today I invite you to scrutinise where you invest your time, energy and money.

  • How many hours a week are you spending on social media or watching TV?
  • How much quality time do you spend with your family & friends?
  • Do you spend too much time at work? Could you change the way you travel to and from work so that this time is used more effectively (for example, I discovered that when I drive, I can listen to a podcast, while if I take a cab or Uber, I can work on the iPad or laptop)?
  • Does your schedule adequately reflect your priorities and what you tell yourself is important?
  • What “shiny objects” get you side-tracked and off-focus? Where are you led into temptation?

Unless you have your priorities clearly identified – as the treasures of your heart and mind, clearly set out in front of you – life will happen and get in the way. You will chase after a good idea, forgetting that it’s not aligned with your call to greatness!

Today, I invite you to focus on your target and find ways to consistently maintain that focus, so that you are not lead into temptation. Keep your eyes on becoming all that you can be, that

dazzling, radiant, immortal creature, pulsating all through with such energy and joy and wisdom and love as we cannot now imagine. (CS Lewis)

Sermon: Slavery or Freedom

Beth Gray - blogger, coach, consultantLeave a comment

Yesterday, July 1st – was Canada Day… in a couple of days, the United States will be celebrating 4th of July – a day of celebration of independence.  Choosing whom to serve.  It seems very appropriate then, that today we consider Romans 6: 12-23 that Phil Edmonstonread for us: freedom or slavery, discussing who we choose to serve.

For my example today, I’m going to use “anger”, because it is such a controlling emotion. How many have not felt controlled by their anger, rather than in control of their anger.  But the reality is that you could replace anger with any sin, because there are so many to which we can be slaves. Proverbs 6, verses 16 to 19 caution us:

16 There are six things that the Lord hates,
    seven that are an abomination to him:
17 haughty eyes (pride of the heart – arrogance, someone who is holier than thou, looking down on others because someone is better than…), a lying tongue (deception in speech, a lie is a lie – no matter how white or little),
    and hands that shed innocent blood (while it’s talking about murder, it even applies to gossip & character assassination),
18 a heart that devises wicked plans (remember – “as a man thinks in his heart, so he is”, this is premeditation, planning)
    feet that make haste to run to mischief (they have gone from machinations to execution readily – from planning to doing without restraint. But it’s more than that!  It is also when we know what to do and we consciously choose NOT to do it! It could be not participating in gossip – when you listen avidly and fuel the fire; it could be character assassination),
19 a false witness who breathes out lies (knowingly speaking falsely about another person, not simply lying – and that, once again, could include circulating rumours and gossiping),
    and (this is the worst one of them all, the 7th) one who sows discord among brothers (this is basically the sum of the previous 6… and we are back again to gossip & slander, speaking ill of another behind their back, creating divisions rather than unity).

But, unlike animals, humans suppress anger, and more importantly we have anger problems because we forget the purpose of anger.  Instead of using anger to protect our “cubs”, life, loved ones or friends, we have started to use anger to protect our ego!And the reason that I want to talk about anger, is that it is so closely related to many of these sins mentioned in Proverbs.  You know, that emotion that you feel: fury; wrath; rage; mad; ticked off; peeved… whatever you want to call it!  However much we may value loving kindness, we still get angry.  But what happens when anger controls your life? Let me clarify what I mean: there is a healthy and normal anger.  It is part of our fight/flight/freeze response, in which many species, not just humans, get a driving force of adrenaline that helps them escape from danger. With this, we respond to a perceived threat, whether to our children, our self, or our home.  We also see in animals, the same as in humans, the anger that arises from frustration, when we are trying to do a task, and confront failure in our performance.  I’ve watch more than one horse kick the bucket to get the water out!

And by ego, I mean our perception of our ego, which is partly how we want to regard ourselves (internal) and how we want others to perceive us (external).  Ego is our sense of “I”, the way we differentiate ourselves from others.  For some, it is an intoxicating sense of self-importance, something that must be protected.  But it is interesting that the Western view of ego is so different from the Eastern view of ego. For us, our ego is the self, the conscious part of me (my mind, my being) that knows the experience.  But, in Eastern tradition, ego is simply a part of the mind, a trait, a characteristic – but it isn’t actually WHO you are.  And this is important to differentiate when we are talking about anger, especially anger that is directed at protecting the ego! And this kind of anger is poisonous to us.

You all know the story about the boy with the bad temper, whose father sent him out with a bag of nails, and to hammer a nail into the fence every time he lost his temper, right? The first day, he had to drive 37 nails into the fence.  Over time, he got control of his temper, and it gradually dwindled down.  He discovered that it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.  Finally, the day arrived: the boy didn’t lose his temper at all.  He told his father, and for a moment they celebrated that he had finally learnt to control it.  The father than suggested that for each day that the boy was able to hold his temper, he pull one nail out of the fence!  It took a long time, but finally the boy was able to return to his father and tell him that all the nails were finally pulled out of the fence.
The father took the son by the hand, and they went to look at the fence. And here they saw all of the holes that the nails had left.  The fence would never been the same.  And the father told his son: “When ou say things in anger, or lash out at another person, the words leave scars like these.  You can put a knife into a person and draw it back out, but the hole remains.  Saying “I’m sorry” will not fix the wound.  It is still there.”

Many of you may think that you handle your anger well: “I don’t express my anger, I hold it in and don’t say nasty things.”  But bottling the anger up inside, if you are not actually addressing it, leads to problems also.  In the Sermon on the Mount, in Matthew 5, verses 21 and 22, Jesus said:

21 “You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder; and whoever murders will be liable to judgment.’ 22 But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of fire.

So, a small question:  how many of you know how a worm gets inside an apple?  You may think that the worm burrows in from the outside.  But scientists have discovered that the worm actually comes from the inside.  What happens is that the insect lays its egg on the apple blossom.  The blossom becomes an apple, and when the worm hatches, it is already INSIDE the apple. This is how our ego works on our thoughts, words and actions.  It is already inside of us, and we are busy protecting it!

But, like I said, our “ego” is not “us” – it is our perception of how we “see” ourselves and how the world “should see” us. It is only when we are able to not identify with our ego, that we are able to stop protecting it against every attack and begin to look rationally at our anger! Many of ous think “that made me so angry” or “if so-and-so hadn’t said that, I wouldn’t have reacted that way”.  But the truth is: they didn’t actually “make us” do anything. They may have been a source of temptation, but the reality is that they simply EXPOSED us and how we relate to our ego! And what comes out of our mouths when we are angry, is simply an expression of what is in our heart!

If we would take a moment, and “listen” to the thoughts in our head when we are angry, our self-talk, you might hear:

  • I can’t believe they would say that me!
  • How dare they think they could treat me this way!
  • They aren’t going to get away with this!
  • Karma will teach them a lesson!
  • This isn’t fair!

And so our mind  and thoughts escalate it… IT controls us! How many times have you been angry about a perceived injustice and your mind just won’t let it go? You know you need to relax and stop thinking about the situation or the words, but it keeps playing over and over in your head.  It’s as if there were a recorder stuck on replay! And you decide you’re going to forgive, and the anger just keeps welling up inside of you.  You start praying, and the thoughts interrupt and keep side-tracking you. How long are you a slave to these thoughts and this anger? How long does the replay keep popping up in your mind?

Think about it: how many times is this anger about getting our own way, self-centered desires. You feel righteous indignation – but how righteous is it really? Wasn’t it really about getting your way? Being right? Having your needs met? Ephesians 4:26 warns us:

Be angry, but do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger.

The whole purpose of the Bible is to draw us closer to God: the same God that is LOVE! God is love and we are called to draw near to God, draw near to LOVE. How do you draw near to love when you are controlled by anger? And what happens when you hold onto that anger past nightfall? You push it aside, deeper down, put a lid on it and ignore it. But it’s still there. You haven’t actually dealt with it, you’ve just covered it up. And when you try to draw near to God, you feel that there is something blocking you.

The truth is anger is a powerful emotion that deceives us into using it to demand our own way, and then we arrive in front of perfect love and we don’t know how to accept it, because perfect love drives out fear. Our ego can’t handle us letting go of our fear! It has been protecting itself for so long, that it can’t afford to let us let go of anything! It has to be right! It has to be protected! It cannot be vulnerable. It cannot be open and accepting. It cannot be forgiving.

If you want to get a handle on your anger, anger is not the problem you must address. Your temper is a symptom of what’s going on in your heart. If you gain self-control over your temper that’s great, but the deeper problem that causes your anger is what needs to change. How we act and live flows from what is in our heart – what we desire or want the most.  So, who do you serve this day? Are you a slave of your ego and your desires? Or do you have the freedom to love others? To see their interests, their point of view, and weigh what they want or need as well as your own wants and needs?

Freedom is being open to love – no longer under the yoke of EGO, but rather under the yoke of LOVE. Choose this day whom you will serve!

Sermon: Pentecost Sunday

Beth Gray - blogger, coach, consultantLeave a comment

READINGS:

  • Acts 2: 1-21
  • 1 Corinthians 12: 3b-13

Welcome to Pentecost Sunday – a day when we remember Jesus’ promise to the disciples to send “the Comforter”, so that they would never be alone.  If you recall, in John 7, verse 38, Jesus says:

“Out of the believer’s heart shall flow rivers of living water.”

And the disciples and followers of Jesus were waiting expectantly in Jerusalem for this.  I want to take a moment and look at the promise of the coming of the Holy Spirit, as it is given to us in the Bible, before Acts 2:

One of my favorite verses is in Jeremiah, chapter 31, verses 33-34:

“But this is the covenant which I will make with the house of Israel after those days,” declares the LORD, “I will put My law within them and on their heart I will write it; and I will be their God, and they shall be My people. “They will not teach again, each man his neighbor and each man his brother, saying, ‘Know the LORD,’ for they will all know Me, from the least of them to the greatest of them,” declares the LORD, “for I will forgive their iniquity, and their sin I will remember no more.”

And I am sure you all know Ezekiel 11: 19:

“And I will give them one heart, and put a new spirit within them And I will take the heart of stone out of their flesh and give them a heart of flesh,”

And Joel 2, verses 28 & 29:

“It will come about after this That I will pour out My Spirit on all mankind; And your sons and daughters will prophesy, Your old men will dream dreams, Your young men will see visions. Even on the male and female servants I will pour out My Spirit in those days.”

Maybe you remember John the baptist, who promised in Matthew 3, verse 11:

“As for me, I baptize you with water for repentance, but He who is coming after me is mightier than I, and I am not fit to remove His sandals; He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and fire.”

And then Jesus promises, in John 15, verse 26:

“When the Helper comes, whom I will send to you from the Father, that is the Spirit of truth who proceeds from the Father, He will testify about Me,”

And a final verse: Luke 24, verse 49:

“And behold, I am sending forth the promise of My Father upon you; but you are to stay in the city until you are clothed with power from on high.”

I would guess that there was a LOT of expectation among the disciples and followers as they lived together in Jerusalem, waiting for this outpouring of the Holy Spirit upon them, so that they could then go forth as commanded and testify.   As you will have noticed, the promise of the Holy Spirit was not simply a promise from Jesus, but rather a promise that was given time and again throughout the prophets, as being God’s promise.  We know, from Genesis 1 that the Holy Spirit is the creative power in the Creation story, the same way that Jesus is seen as being the Word and power of Creation.

Job 33, verse 4 reminds us:

“The spirit of God has made me; the breath of the Almighty gives me life.“

David says, in Psalm 104: 30

“When you send your Spirit, they are created, and you renew the face of the earth“

We also know from Proverbs that the Spirit is Wisdom: Proverbs 4, verses 5 to 9:

Get wisdom; get insight;
    do not forget, and do not turn away from the words of my mouth.
6 Do not forsake her, and she will keep you;
    love her, and she will guard you.
…
8 Prize her highly, and she will exalt you;
    she will honor you if you embrace her.
….”

And so we find, on the day of Pentecost, the disciples all gathered together, waiting.  As we have read in Acts chapter 1, they were sharing everything, they ate together, and they spent their time in prayer.  Yesterday, in preparation for Pentecost, a small group of us got together to pray and prepare for today.  Our prayers centered on:

  1. Asking for a new outpouring of the Holy Spirit in our lives and in this church:  “Pour out your Spirit upon us, for without You I am nothing. Clothe us with power from on high. You promised your Spirit would teach us; we need that teaching. You promised your Spirit would guide us; we need that guidance.”
  2. Submission – special prayers reminding ourselves that “Thy Will be Done”, as opposed to “My Will”
  3. Forgiveness & Reconciliation – the Holy Spirit came to a group where there was no quarreling or envy. They were no longer asking the question they used to ask, “Who is the greatest?” They were no longer seeking to sit on the left or the right of Jesus.  We all recognise that it’s hard to forgive if we’ve been hurt deeply, or something terrible has happened to us, perpetrated by another. But Jesus asks us over and over again:  forgive one another, love one another. We bring love, forgiveness and reconciliation into our world: if we don’t do this, who will?  What does it mean to be a follower of Jesus if we cannot forgive? And so, yesterday, we prayed for Forgiveness and Reconciliation, starting with our relationship with God, moving on to forgiving ourselves and finally with forgiveness and reconciliation with others.
  4. We prayed for unity and oneness of mind and purpose in Balboa Union Church:  The disciples were of one mind, one will, one feeling, one plan, one purpose, and one prayer.
  5. Gratitude – we practiced thankfulness and gratitude for the work that the Spirit does in each one of us, from the inside out.

And so, this morning, we read in Acts 2 of the actual coming of the Holy Spirit to the disciples and followers of Christ in Jerusalem on the day of Pentecost:

2:2 And suddenly from heaven there came a sound like the rush of a violent wind, and it filled the entire house where they were sitting.
2:3 Divided tongues, as of fire, appeared among them, and a tongue rested on each of them.
2:4 All of them were filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other languages, as the Spirit gave them ability.

As we know, some of those in the crowd, who were being addressed in their native languages (they could understand what the disciples were preaching because it was their language),  were amazed and perplexed, saying to one another, “What does this mean?” Others simply thought they were drunk – this is all just a big joke.  And so Peter stands and addresses the crowd to say “this is what the prophet Joel promised:

2:17 ‘In the last days it will be, God declares, that I will pour out my Spirit upon all flesh, and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, and your young men shall see visions, and your old men shall dream dreams.
2:18 … in those days I will pour out my Spirit; and they shall prophesy.

So, apart from having this divine experience of speaking in other languages and prophesy, what does it mean for the Church today to have an outpouring of the Spirit?  If we have a quick look at 1 Corinthians 12, which we read earlier this morning, we can see:

To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good:

  1. There are many gifts and many services, but they all come from the same Spirit;
  2. There are many activities, but they are all lead by God;
  3. Some get wisdom
  4. Some get knowledge
  5. Some get faith
  6. Others get healing
  7. Working of miracles
  8. Prophecy
  9. Discernment of Spirits
  10. Speaking in tongues
  11. interpretation of tongues

But the most important thing to remember is:

12:11 All these are activated by one and the same Spirit, who allots to each one individually just as the Spirit chooses.
12:12 For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ.

As a Church, each member has different gifts and strengths – but we need to be pulling together and working together towards one vision and one goal.

They say that there was a man called Louie,  and he was shipwrecked on a desert island.  Finally, after many years, he was rescued.  Now, before leaving the island, he gave the rescue party a tour:
“I built myself a house. That’s it there. Here’s the barn, and over here is the church I worshiped in.”
“What’s that building over there?” one of the rescuers asked.
Louie sneered. “That’s the church I used to belong to.”

It seems to be human nature to be divided and pulling different ways, and it takes a lot of effort to leave to one side our pride and our prejudices, the need to be right and the desire to have control, and put everything under the control of the Holy Spirit, so that as a Church we all pull in the same direction towards a common goal: Divine Will, rather than our personal agendas.

This morning, as we invite the Holy Spirit to flood this church once again with presence and power, I invite all of you to take a moment to put aside “ego” and “self” and to ask God for Divine Will and Divine appointment to take place in this Church, that we grow as God would have us grow.